China: Where The Streets Have No Name (Or So It Seems)

China is weird.

Taking a walk down the street confirms this 100 times over, especially if you happen to be a Westerner.

The paths are lined with almost exclusive mix of the same 5 shops. One sells noodles, one sells magazines and cigarettes, one sells what appear to be stolen power tools, one sells knock off iPhones and the other sells ill-fitting clothes and shoes. Outside these shops swarm unrelenting amounts of Chinese people who don't seem to be doing an awful lot but getting in your way. There's construction going on on rickety scaffolding, people welding in jeans and a t-shirt letting the sparks fall onto the people walking below and people ripping up and replacing paving stones without bothering to close the path to pedestrians.

You're taking your life into your own hands by just stepping outside here, especially if you plan on crossing the road. Cars and buses cut randomly across zebra crossings while people are crossing with nothing but a cautionary beep. Electric scooters are very popular but their riders haven't seemed to be able to figure out which side of the road is which; there are almost as many going against the flow of traffic than there are going the "right" way.

Simply walking down the street as a non-Chinese person is enough to attract stares. I've even been approached by random people who say "Hello" and proceed to stare at me in amazement as I walk away. At first it was a novelty but I'm getting pretty tired of it already. I tracked down a McDonalds the other day and was just about to tuck into my first piece of actual meat since I arrived when a couple of teenagers wandered up to the table and proceeded to stare at me point blank. By the time one of them had mustered up the courage to talk I'd had enough. The fact that what he chose to say was "American?" only made things worse. The place was mostly empty and I was pretty sure these kids could speak only basic English at best so I politely told them the had small dicks with a smile on my face which made me feel quite a lot better. They even repeated "small dicks, small dicks" to themselves before bowing and walking off. I guess at least I can have some fun here despite not speaking the language...